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Planning the wedding of your dreams does not mean you have to spend your life paying for the expense. While extravagance and elegance turn head and make for great conversation, the reality of the fact prevails that it is only one day. Weddings are meant to unify, not liquify. If you are like the average consumer, you are planning this wedding amid other priority budget expenses. With this other bit of reality biting at the heels of wedding planners, it is necessary to assess the situation and determine how you can have what you want without it costing a fortune.
Wedding planning is, in most cases, done particularly by the bride. In this case, however, we are involving the groom. After all, it is his day too. Serious planning will help eliminate a lot of unwanted costs, whereas fly by the night shopping and service selecting can add up quickly.
The first step is to sit down together and figure out what you want out of the day. Each of you make a list of what is most important to you in order of importance. In an effort to save time and stress, keep the lists to ten or fifteen items. Once your lists are complete, cut them in half. That’s right, leave off the last half of the list and keep it as an “extra’s” list.
The next step, is to compile your lists by crossing off what is doubled up and making one master list. If you have doubles, take turns choosing from your “extra’s” list to add to the master list. You should come up with something suitably covering all the major aspects of the wedding day.
Then, from that list, decide together what would not ruin the day if it were not there. For example, would you be distraught if it was not an open bar or if the flower girl did not drop rose pedals. Whatever you choose, cross this off your master list. Be honest with yourselves about this, though, because you do not want to look back with regrets later.
After your master budget list is complete, it is now time to focus on the invitations list. Again, each of you sit down and make a list of who you would like to see at your wedding in order of importance. In an effort to save time, do not include people you think others would like to see or people your family is friends with. This could go on for days. Keep the list to people you know and have met, this will keep expenses down. After your lists are complete, cut them in half the same way you did your budget list leaving off the second half as an “extra’s” list.
Compile your two lists, crossing off doubles and taking from “extra’s” lists, into one master invitations list. This will help you determine how much to estimate for stationary, food costs, cake slices, beverages, catering supplies, seating, and parking. If you can condense your list further without hurting anyone’s feelings, including your own, by all means do so.
Once your list is complete, you now have a master budget to work with. Call around to compare prices on products and services for the best deals. That way you can have a rough estimate for how much this is going to cost. Here is an example of what one frugal wedding planning couple’s master budget worksheet looked like: (This scenario is for a very small and very casual wedding. When making their master lists, they were able to determine successfully what they could do without, where they could cut corners and how to spread their expenses over a longer period of time. This table is their end result.)
Bridal Attire: $36.00
Maid of Honor’s Attire: $0.00 (bought own)
Bride’s Maid’s Attire: $0.00 (bought own)
Flower girl’s Attire: $0.00 (no flower girl)
Catering/supplies: $156.00 (barbequed)
Church fee: $0.00 (outdoor wedding at park)
Invitations/ Response cards: $12.00 for handmade invitations, no response cards.
Music/ Entertainment: $0.00 (their music)
Flowers: $46.00 (chose silk, made own arrangements)
Photography: $12.00 (disposables)
Favors: $12.00 (bubbles in mesh) Groom’s Attire: $42.00
Best Man’s Attire: $0.00 (bought own)
Usher’s Attire: $0.00 (bought own)
Ring Bearer’s Attire: $0.00 (no ring bearer)
Reception site: $0.00 (chose a state park)
Cake: $46.00 (local bakery)
Thank you cards: $0.00 used left over blank invitations and decorated as thank you’s.
Decorations: $16.00 (used minimal)
Garter, toasting goblets, guest book, memory book: $55.00 (combined books)
Honeymoon: $142.00 (one night in hotel)
Miscellaneous: $25.00 (extra’s)
This couple spent about $642.00 on their wedding because they cut costs by finding whatever they could for free. They also decided together what they could do without. Their wedding was relatively small with only twenty people at the site in all. They decided to save the money for a larger reception on their first anniversary, then go on a honeymoon vacation a couple years later. By spreading their expenses, eliminating costs and finding the best deals this couple was able to create a wonderful memory.
“The quality of your wedding is not dependant on the amount of money you spend.” Keep this in mind and a lot of the stress and worry about what others will think about how you choose to cut costs will pretty much disappear.
There are many ways to cut costs even if you are interested in having an elegant wedding including gowns, tuxedo’s and catering. The rule of thumb is to comparison shop every step of the way. Don’t take the first offer you get, find a better one down the street. Visit bridal shows, bridal fairs, do mail order and take advantage of family heirlooms.
While doing much of the work yourself will cut costs dramatically, you can still get away with having a catered reception without feeling the hurt of the expense. One way to do this is by throwing the reception at your home or property or, if it is not large enough to accommodate, a family member or friend’s home or property. Instead of having a kitchen staff and waiters, order food platters from your favorite local restaurants and serve a buffet. This is a little more time consuming, but less so then doing all the cooking and food preparation (which, of course, is another option) yourself.
Helpful Resources:
• 1001 Ways to Save Money . . . and Still Have a Dazzling Wedding, Sharon Naylor
• Bridal Bargains: Secrets to Throwing a Fantastic Wedding on a Realistic Budget, Denise Fields, Alan Fields
• How to Have and Elegant Wedding for $5,000 (or less), Achieving Beautiful Simplicity Without Mortgaging Your Future, Jan Wilson, Beth Wilson Hickman
• How to Have a Big Wedding on a Small Budget: Cut your wedding costs by half – or more, Diane Warner
• The Working Woman’s Wedding Planner, Susan Tatsui-D’arcy
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